So...I am terrible at blogging. It takes so much effort for me...I don't know why...maybe I just haven't done it frequently enough that it still takes thinking to do...and right now I don't believe I am capable of much thinking.
I love being a mom -- Little Olivia is such a miracle. She is beautiful and sweet and so strong. She kicks her legs and moves her arms so much we can't keep her swaddled! She holds her neck up AMAZING for a 3 week old. She loves to sit up (us supporting her neck and back of course!!) and look around -- my mom says that is unusual for a baby her age. She has gained 4 oz from her birth weight and 12 oz from when we left the hospital -- She is now 6 lbs and 10 oz. and 19.7 inches long. She had her 1st check up and is the Dr. says she is doing amazing! She has TONS of dark brown -- almost black hair, and the fun part is that it is growing :) It is longer and fuller than it was 3 wks ago. I don't think she is going to lose it :)
BUT -- she will NOT calm down at night. We get a night or two of good rest (meaning 2 stints of -2 hours of un-interrupted sleep -- usually with us on the bed b/c she hates her crib at night -- go figure?? She'll sleep there in the day, but not at night!), and then she just starts to go crazy at night again. Last night around 2:30 am after being up with her since 10:00pm and feeding her twice -- I had to pass her off to Jason. He is back in school and I hate to do that, but she just wouldn't calm down for me. She screamed and screamed even with him, and then finally calmed down and slept until 5:30 am and then until 8:00am -- all while I slept with her in our spare bedroom bed so as to not disturb Jason.
I don't think you can ever understand how incredibly EXHAUSTING being a mom is until you go through it. I thought I was prepared for motherhood -- hahaha...funny. I wasn't. I mean I am, but I just didn't anticipate how hard and physically and emotionally draining it would be.
It is so hard to hear this beautiful little girl just cry and not be-able to know how to help her. I've been reading so many books trying to figure out how to help her (and me!!!) I just feel like such a bad mom when she cries and I can't get her to stop. And I HATE that I get frustrated. I wanted to be the mom that would just calmly soothe my baby when she cried. AND...and can be that for the most part, but after 4 hours of walking around our tiny apartment, putting her in the swing, picking her up, trying to lay her down, picking her up, walking around the apt...and on and on....the frustration rises. I am emotionally exhausted by the time I finally give up and pass her to Jason.
She isn't crazy colicky...just fussy...and refuses to go to sleep at night. So...those are my reasons for not blogging. I am either sleeping whenever I can -- or holding a fussing baby. Doesn't leave much time for uploading pictures and writing commentary.
HOWEVER....that is my goal today -- I will get some pictures uploaded and a blog post ready to go by tomorrow. I want to show her off! She is seriously so beautiful and such a sweetie -- she really is...even with all the fussing, she has the sweetest moments that just melt my heart. So...stay tuned for a few pics :)
4 comments:
I'm so sorry!!! I know how that goes. No fun. Love the baby. Don't love the crying and lack of sleep. Hopefully it get better!!!
Don't feel bad that you get frustrated, you wouldn't be normal if you didn't given the circumstances. I am sure you are an amazing mother and I can't wait to see pics of her! Congratulations, I am so excited for you. Being a mother truly is the greatest thing ever and totally worth the sleep deprivation.
Oh Shammy bless you! It is SO HARD. You're not alone, so don't feel bad. I say give a newborn 6 weeks to climatize...ya know, to figure things out. I had a lot of friends suggest the book Baby Wise and I"m a big believer in it. But don't panic, the beginning is the hardest. It will get better!!!! And remember- it doesn't hurt them to cry. Maybe you could put ear plugs in and take a nap...I would! Love ya girl.
Awww Shandra.....I'm sad that I don't live across from you anymore. I wish I could come over and help you. Being a mom is really draining physically and emotionally. Reading your post brought back a lot of memories of how I felt with Katelyn. I truly hated to hear her cry and would do just about anything to get her to stop. Just remember that you have needs too and it is okay to let her cry for a little bit to care for yourself. I would try to hold Katelyn all the time and I think she got really spoiled! I hope things get better for you soon and I can't wait to see more pictures of little Olivia! Miss you guys.
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