Two more months!!

So, I'm officially 32 weeks today. It's funny...at times i feel like I have been pregnant FOREVER, but other times, I can't believe it is only two months away. I am so excited, and yet extremely apprehensive of how will I will be as a mother. The burden of my responsibility for this child seems so heavy -- and I have to admit it stresses me out quite a bit. It doesn't overwhelm my excitement to physically have her in my arms in such a short while, but it does weigh heavy on my mind.

I have ALWAYS wanted to be a mother and to be at home to raise my children, and I always thought I would start really young -- which wasn't quite in the cards. Sometimes, I think that may have been less apprehensive at a younger age -- probably not. I just am so concerned for the world that this little girl will grow up in, and how I can help guide here through this life to avoid as many of the pitfalls as she can. I know I can't protect her from everything, and I already have this heavy trepidation of what she may have to face in life. I'm so crazy! I wouldn't change my life path -- even my difficult trials -- and as long as I help her to gain a testimony of the Savior, and a knowledge of His plan for her, and help her to learn to rely on Him -- "It'll all work out" as President Hinckley said.

So...that is my little vent. Jason says I worry way too much. He's like...you know she comes out as a baby right? And she is a baby for quite a while...and then a little girl...and then...etc...He teases me a lot about it. I'm also worried about working a few days. I hope that I will balance work and motherhood. It's just with Jason's school, and bishopric calling, and working on research, and then me working 2-3 days...it seems like a lot to balance. I'm sure we will do just fine, but the unknown is so hard! I know I need to just relax and take it one day at a time.

On to more fun baby news....she is a crazy little girl! She is a total kicker and mover. All day and all night. Its fun to feel her, and see my stomach move -- Jason can finally feel her most of the time -- it took him FOREVER to really feel her. Now, you can visibly see it, so it can't really miss it now!

Her moving so much is a lot of fun, but definitely making me really tired. I'm not sleeping at night -- and working 5 days a week with unrestful nights is starting to take its toll! I only have 5 more weeks until the end of the semester at the school though, so I can hang in there! I have been so blessed to be able to work full time and feel as good as I have. I haven't really swollen up much at all. My hands and toes slightly swell if I don't drink enough water. I have some RLS at night, and she gets caught under my right rib a lot -- which can be pretty painful. Jason gets all of my complaining, and is so patient with me, but overall things are going really well.

Ok...so after the novel...here is a picture. Requested by Ashley! It me at almost 32 weeks. Jason takes awful pictures....or I just look awful in them...so I took this one my self. Thanks to my sister Sheryl for the winter maternity stuff!! Its getting COLD up here!

I'll attemp to have Jason take another picture today when I have actually gotten ready with hair and make-up. This was on our way to the temple and my hair was all slicked back, so no go on the full picures!